Weihnachtsfreuden

powerless
clueless
helpless
feeling the abyss gaping under my feet
and nowhere to escape
no shoulder to hold on
no soothing words
relieving the pain
of my own inability
to create the gold
i see in my mind
but only dirt leaves my hands
soiling me down to the bone
stealing away the last of my strength
leaving me empty and hollow behind
with no path to see
and no light to shine
to make me see the errors in my ways
just crawling along
to a place unseen

I try to convince myself
that it is just my nature
that I will recover from doubt
but all I can hear
is that endless voice calling me liar
laughing at me
while I stumble along
like a blind man
bereft of all dignity he could ever master
just trying the best what he can
failing and failing all over
never enough

Once I swore
that I would pay any price
any due to follow my heart
whatever I do
once I had found you
I know you were true
I endlessly will love you
would give my life for you
there are now words for all the good that you do
there are no bounds that keep from looking for you
all my wishes came true
but somewhere deep inside
my greed still whispers
that price should not be due

What kind of man can I be for you
if all I am is weak
if all I do is break
if all I do is loose
how can I keep from loosing you
my precious love
you are my dream come true
you touch is the sweetest of relevations
the tenderest of kisses
the sorest of misses
can never live it up to you...